You Already Are

We were watching the newest movie in the Chronicles of Narnia the other night, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, and I was reminded how much I LOVE the ending (if you haven't watched it or read the book and don't want anything given away, you may want to skip this part). At the end, Edmund, Lucy, Eustace, Reepicheep, and Prince Caspian are on the shores of Aslan's Country (I just love the picture that gives us of Heaven). At one point, Caspian asks Aslan if his father is in His Country and is given the choice to find out for himself. But if he chooses to go into Aslan's country, he can never come back to his world. Caspian decides to stay in his world, saying that he spent too much time looking for what was missing instead of ruling well with what he was given. He tells Aslan that he will be a better king. Then Aslan says, "You already are."

"You already are."

That doesn't seem possible to us. Once our heart changes and we see the areas we need to change, improve, or give over to the Lord in a greater way, we expect that we'll have to prove it. We need to live it out before the Lord trusts us with it again.  But God says to us:

"You already are."

That's the way He sees us. There's no striving, only grace. My head knows this, but my heart has been struggling to grasp it lately. Yes, we need to make those changes and follow through on what the Lord shows us. But we don't need to hold our hearts back. He sees us as we really are - in Him.

I've been taken back by how this process of adoption has made me re-evaluate my parenting. I have seen so many areas that need changing and things I want to do better. In many ways, I've questioned if I'm deserving of someone choosing me to be the mommy to their baby.

I too easily forget that God has already chosen me - not only to be mommy to this new little one, but to 3 precious girls already. Not because of who I am, but because of who He's made me. And I'm beginning to open my ears and try to listen to God speaking these words over me: "You already are."